Tuesday

On Seeking Commitment - Part 2

Last week I posted about my procrastination habit and some of my frustrations over it.  I asked myself some questions: So why is it that I continually fail to commit fully to my dream? Is it because I don't like the circumstances under which I must carry forth determination? Why am I still seeking that which I should already have? I am still trying to answer these. I think I have been avoiding them for a very long time in my life, and it is entirely possible that I will be struggling with the for a long time to come. I mean, I really hope not, but hopefully acknowledging this struggle is the first step to overcoming it.

Well, darn it. I was hoping that with a few days of thought, it would all solve itself, I could come back here and tell you that I have the answer figured out & all wrapped up in a pretty bow. Well, not really, I'm not silly enough to think problems solve themselves. I sure tend to hope they will though, every time. I guess life just keeps telling me "No, think again." But I can share with you one mini-realization that I had last week:
I noticed that the larger a task is, the larger my resistance. However if I break it down into small steps - and I mean miniscule, 5-minute "micro-actions" - it helps me to get over the block. Sometimes this very no-pressure way of starting the task, is so easy that I continue and get much farther through the work. Like getting the ball rolling, I suppose. It helped on this post, it helped when I was working on that inspiration board. Heck it even helps for doing my taxes (filling in the forms just a few questions at a time, going back to finish on another day). Yes, I'm talking tiny, tiny steps here.

In a comment to one of my earlier posts, the lovely Vineeta shared the following quote, "And the day came, when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom."-Anais Nin. It seems that this is more & more true as time goes by! It hurts more with each passing milestone date. Like my birthday which was this past Saturday (I don't like my new age so let's just move on ok?) Where New Year's always fills me with hope for what I can accomplish, my birthday always reminds me of what I haven't accomplished yet. I am guessing this also has something to do with why I get stuck?

Ok, I think I've rambled quite enough here for now. I'm sure I'll be bringing this up again, I just ordered a book called Inner Productivity that I'm hoping will help me get over my issue. Thanks for sticking around to read this, if you've gotten this far!

5 comments:

  1. Hi Christy, great post ! I too procrastinate and get so frustrated witht all the time and opportunities I feel i have wasted...I do my baby steps as well when it comes to completing big tasks - from bookkeeping (yuk) housework(double yuk) and even the creative aspect of my work which i really enjoy , I find doing a little chunk at a time is manageable and before you know it - job completed !

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  2. Hi Christy.
    I acknowledge you for sharing your trials and tribulations.
    I agree that taking small steps one at the time is the only way any of us gets anything done.
    What I am really curious about are your bigger questions???
    I can see you are restless to have something different happen.
    Love Wilma

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  3. So many posts after the previous one- Not bad at all. And your birthday should always be celebrated like none other. Wow! someone like you was born & there isn't another Christ like you- think of it.
    And about procrastination & productivity- dont laugh but there are days when the 1st thought in my head is - "I'm productive today" I keep saying that to myself & before I know I've forgotten all about it & am actually doing some work.
    Thanx for noticing the 'about me' change. Your link list is looking very impressive. I'm completely blown by the work the class is turning in. We are in good company :)

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  4. I had a birthday last week as well, and I think I am older than you. It does not get any easier as the years go by. Doing the little chunks helps. What makes it even trickier to me is all the new things that I still want to do.

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  5. Hi Christy, I hear you asking a lot of questions and it reminds me of one of my favorite quotes by Socrates: An unexamined life is not worth living. I believe there are people who have answers and there are those who have questions. I definitely have more questions than answers and it's taken me a while to embrace this about me.

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